Commentary: Maintaining a healthy relationship

  • Published
  • By Capt. Jeffrey Geddes
  • 75th Medical Group
Our relationships with our family and significant others help to keep us balanced and bring meaning to our lives. Maintaining a healthy relationship requires effort and does not always come easily.

Healthy relationships allow both partners to feel supported and connected, but still feel independent. Below are some signs to and keys to a healthy relationship:
  • Treat each other with respect
  • Feel supported to do things your partner likes
  • Don't criticize each other
  • Allow each other to spend time with friends and family
  • Listen to each other and compromise
  • Share some interests such as movies, sports, reading, dancing or music
  • You are not afraid to share their thoughts and feelings
  • Celebrate each other's accomplishments and successes
  • Respect boundaries
  • Trust each other and don't require their partner to "check in"
  • Don't pressure the other to do things that they don't want to do
  • Don't constantly accuse each other of cheating or being unfaithful
Unhealthy relationships can include physical and emotional abuse. If you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around your partner -- constantly watching what you say and do in order to avoid a blow-up -- chances are your relationship is unhealthy and abusive.

Other signs that you may be in an abusive relationship include a partner who belittles or tries to control you, feelings of self-loathing, helplessness, and desperation.

Relationship difficulties and unhealthy relationships can lead to feelings of anxiety, depression, and in some situations thoughts of suicide. These feelings can further lead to difficulties within the relationship, causing break downs in communication and motivation to make changes.

Our relationships can enrich our lives immensely, but they do require hard work and commitment.
 
If you notice signs of an unhealthy relationship in a family, friend, coworker or yourself, seek assistance. There are many helping resources available to assist both military members and civilians.

The following are some of the helping resources available:

Military and civilians

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, 800-273-8255 (TALK)

RealWarriors.net, www.realwarriors.net

Domestic Abuse Victim Advocate, 801-917-1021

Military

Mental Health Clinic, 801-777-7909

Family Advocacy Program, 801-777-3497

AD & Dependents: Chaplain, 801-777-2106

Airmen & Family Readiness Center, 801-777-4681

Military OneSource, 800-342-9647

Military Family Life Consultant (MFLC), 801-586-8582

Civilians

Wingman Advocates, 801-777-CALL (2255)
 
Employee Assistance Program, 800-222-0364
 
Occupational Medicine Services, 801-777-1155/1163

Civilian Health Promotion Services, 801-586-9584