Easing the stress of deployment

  • Published
  • By Bryan Magaña
  • 419th Fighter Wing Public Affairs
HILL AIR FORCE BASE, Utah --  Katherine Brewer has a routine. Monday mornings, she writes and answers emails. Wednesdays at 1 p.m., she treats her one-year-old son, Aidan, to the children's museum. Friday nights, she phones her husband, Master Sgt. Thomas Brewer, 419th Civil Engineer Squadron, who is on a 120-day deployment to Kirkuk, Iraq, .

Keeping busy is one way Mrs. Brewer copes with her husband's first deployment. 

"If I keep my routine and I schedule things, it makes my time go by faster," said Katherine, a former staff sergeant in the 419th Medical Squadron who is now a stay-at-home mom.

Mrs. Brewer oversees the volunteer-run key spouses program for the 419 CES. The key spouse program aims to support spouses of deployed Airmen by organizing social functions and identifying and meeting physical and emotional needs--anything from leaky roofs to loneliness.

"It's a way to stay connected to other people who are going through the same thing," said Teresa Bills, whose husband, Senior Master Sgt. Emmett Bills, 419 CES, is also serving in Kirkuk. 

Mrs. Brewer met Mrs. Bills at a pre-deployment barbeque held for the families of deploying 419th Fighter Wing Airmen. She has remained in touch through the key spouse program. Mrs. Bills 16-year-old stepdaughter often helps Katherine care for Aidan. 

"We've grown a lot in one month," said Mrs. Brewer of their friendship. "I'm a social person, I need the connection." 

Mrs. Brewer notes that key spouses is an important program for family members. In the Reserve, Airmen rarely meet up more than once a month, making it more difficult to identify spouses' needs. It also provides opportunities for children to get together. In the past month, key spouses has hosted numerous events, including a Halloween party for the younger children.

Mrs. Brewer suggests surrounding oneself with good people and the key spouse program helps, she said.

The social events are just as good for her as they are for her son, she said. It may also be good for her husband in Iraq.

Keeping busy and having a positive outlook help the deployed spouses stay focused because they are not worrying about problems at home, Mrs. Brewer said.

"It's not all about you anymore," she said. "They have to stay focused on their job. I believe what he's doing and I honestly support what he does."

Teresa said by supporting her husband, she is also supporting the country. 

"We have to remember what good they're doing over there," Mrs. Bill said. "It makes you feel good to know that they are helping, giving them (Iraqis) a better lifestyle."

Mrs. Brewer stays in touch with spouses of Airmen from CES, as well as from the 419th Security Forces Squadron, which is also deployed to Kirkuk.

"We combined with security forces," she said. Senior Master Sgt. Sheila Brown. Sergeant Brown oversees the key spouses program for SFS and collaborates with Mrs. Brewer to organize events for the spouses.

Mrs. Brewer also meets with spouses whose loved ones are active duty or deployed to locations outside of Iraq, but she focuses on keeping it in the family.

Sergeant Brewer sends his wife updated rosters of deployed personnel whose spouses may not yet be involved with the program, and she follows up with phone calls.

She said she wants to ensure key spouses is as inclusive as possible.

Key spouses can fill in the gaps until their loved ones return home, Mrs. Brewer said. The 419 CES and 419 SFS are due home in January, when many of the families will celebrate a belated Christmas, as well as a new year.

"It's kind of a blessing in disguise, this whole deployment thing," she said. "I didn't want him to go, but it made me realize how much I love him."